FYI: I am still a human

8 06 2009

One of the thing that I strongly believe is that “words are meaningless without an action”. If you can’t prove yourself at your words then it simply means that you are not important for me. I can’t believe or trust someone just on  his/her words. One has to prove oneself infront of me. But recenlty, there is something different happened to me, which I can’t believe.

I became reason for someone’s problem solution. In response; she said, “aliiii, thank you so much” followed by some urdu phrase “main aap ki bohat mushkoor houn : میں اٌپ کی بھت مشکور ھوں (see, i am not that bad at urdu)“. These were the few words that I “heard” and for the first time I was actually feeling the real smile behind all these words. I could imagine her saying this with a little smile on her face which was pure, smile which was on face with no mental tension – for that particular moment.

Most of the time, I just act in response to people words because they want that reaction from me. The particular situation wants that particular reaction. But that moment was one of those moment in my life, when I smiled for real. From my heart. I was feeling as if there was some problem of mine which has been solved and I am happy.

I can say that I have packed my emotions and kept them in some closet for long but after that day I realized that I still missed some emotions to pack. I felt the words and it’s meaning without any action. I can say that I am still a human, not a robot.


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2 responses

12 06 2009
Raaji

Good one. We greatly underestimate the power of words at times. I have learned from my experiences that words and actions need to go hand in hand. Actions without words are sour and words without actions are meaningless. but they both have the ability to touch our souls in more ways than we know and think🙂

As per my blog… Totally granted. I see your point of view and if you read closely, I have also said that one who falls in love once is very capable of falling in love again but our experiences vary just like we all do from each other.

As far as the anger issue goes, what makes you think that anger is always incited because of possessiveness? There are a lot of things that tick people of. The more we love, the stronger our emotions tend to get. I was just keeping it general with the examples.🙂
Thanks for your opinions.

12 06 2009
doesn't matter

I smiled for true at times …. but i really remember one this time…..

Day was Saturday and i had to buy grocery items for the week. (i hated that)

It was cold that day ,was raining in slight bits but winds were sledging through the chest, that moment I was eating in a restaurant my fav. fillet-o-fish sandwich with no ketch-up … all alone ( though restaurant was full with people)

suddenly my eyes wandered outside the glass. … saw a lady in short skirt …. bare legs…. sharp features and figure that can get anybody’s attention towards ……BUT some newspapers in hands….

I was curious ….. “newspapers are free then y the hell she is selling them” …. i finished the sandwich meanwhile.

wore the jacket…zipped it and got out of the restaurant having a shelter of MIRGOS bag which saved my hair from getting wet (i get cold quite easily🙂

More i got nearer to her …more the beauty of that lady captured my eyes. INTENTIONALLY ,not making her realized the fact that i gazed her,i passed by her and got her jingle-like sound in ears
“Bonjour Monseiur! acheter le journal ?? ” (Goood day sir! Will u buy the newspaper)

“Vous fera combien demande? (How much u demand? my curiosity pused me furthur)

She said :Autant que vous voulez (as much as u like)
i said : 2 francs …..
and the look on her face was a story in itself …. Nobody actually purchased the news paper so far…. and how long she has been there ,ALLAH knows only.

I gave her the coin of two francs and she said
Merci monseiur ….

i moved ahead a couple of yards…. and suddenly came back… said her in english … “Give me those two francs back”
her smile left the same silence on her face as if a train with 100 Miles/Hour passes through a small station and then a silence prevails for a while.

She said nothing and returned the coin to me and turned the face as if nothing happened…. (said thanks too … weird na )

I took the coin and kept in my pocket … but it took me less than 10 seconds to find another coin of 5 francs amount …

I called … Excuze moi madame …. she turned the back with a gesture as if she thought i was gone …. I moved ahead and gave her that 5 franc coin

and she took that with a fear as if i am getting my hand back if she touched the coin
but i said “take it ..it’s urz now”

this time i could see some moisture in her eyes. but with a MONALISA smile (i used here “monalisa” purposely )

then she told me in broken english….. “My baby is hungry and i am too, for night i have nothing”
but with broken smile which made me familiar with the definition of DIGNITY in another way.

I turned back moved a couple of steps ahead and again that jingle-like sound sailed through my ears…..

“Merci monsieur ….”

I turned my head and waved her and walked towards the subway station to catch the metro-train but this time i didn’t have that MIGROS bad on my head and i knew i am sneezing that whole night …. but a Smile that i can say TRUE one accompanied me for a while …..

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